My favourite songs and lyrics by the Jonas Brothers :)

I spent the day at my grandparents, because myself and my brother had caught a cold.
This is what I did when I got bored. :)

"Wipe your mouth, there's bullshit comming out of it."

HAHAHA! My dad's a legend at inventing quotes. ;D

Don't ask me for the truth. Do not. Because you know that I'm the kind of person who's going to give it to you. No lies, no secrects.
Do not ask me for the truth, especially when you know there's a possible outcome that you will not like. A possible answer that you're going to be hurt by. The truth hurts. You should know that.
Don't ask for the truth, get hurt, and then take your anger out on me. Don't twist it to being my fault.
You caused this mess. You're going to clean it up. I'll be here for you, supporting you. But I'm not going clean it up for you. That's your job.

The only way you can fix this problem, this situation, this dilemma, is to face it head-on. You can't just run away from something like this, and pray to God that it'll just fix itself. Running away, and avioding it won't make it better, infact it'll make it worse. A whole lot worse. I know you can fight through it. You are stong. Believe it.

Trust is something that isn't thrown at you. You have to earn in. And the slightest indent can cause you to immediately loose that trust, and faith. You're not going to get it back. Not for a while.

"* ﻞамєѕяят (F) says:


*ur fake smiles work cuz i think ur the happiest girl in the world with all the gr8 mates u got...but ur blogspot says otherwise which makes james feel like :(!

Anyway. I hate you. Get it now?

I am strong. I know I am. I'm better than this.
I just have to keep reminding myself.
Everything will be okay.

I can not go on like this.

I think I should just go away. Run into the darkness. And never show my face again. Never return.
I don't like it here. I don't like the people here. Nothing that's left here is keeping me smiling. There's nothing left that's worth waking up for. There's nothing left falling asleep for, or to dream for. Nothing's working out.


I hate faking smiles. I hate faking laughs. I hate faking happiness.
Inside, I'm destroyed, I'm torn apart.
I'm so tempted to just run, as far as I can, with no intention of returning. But I simply can not. There are too many people who do love me, and are depending on me. I can't hurt them.

I can't call my house 'home' anymore. It doesn't feel like 'home'.

I don't like the person I've become.
We both don't like the people we've become.

I'm not going to run away from this. I'm going to stay strong and fight through it. And so are you.
We can either win this battle and come up winners, or get lost in the chaos and suffer in pain.
I know that we can do it. I hope you believe so too.

Oh, you don't like me? Well that's too bad.
You had your chance, you blew your chance.
Let's face it, I wasn't going to wait for you forever.
And now it's too late.

Oh, and now, I've already got other guys telling me how beautiful I am.
So yeah, stuff you. :)

I once read that a guy can easily fall for his girlfriends' best friend, apon seeking advice about his girlfriend.
... :|

And maybe; I have better, more reliable people in my life who wont break my heart.

"True love does not come by finding the perfect person,

but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."

Her face is priceless.

"I AM SICK OF THAT FUCKING WHORES FACE, I AM SICK OF HER NAGGING, IM SICK OF HER MOODS, IM SICK OF HER COMPANY AND IM SICK OF ALL THE SHIT SHE DOES TO US, MOSTLY US TWO. AND IM SICK OF PUTTING ON THAT FAKE SMILE AND PRETENDING EVERYTHING IS ALRIGHT"
I completely agree.

Yes, there is a meaning behind the song currently playing, and there is a reason why I chose it for this blog. Turn up your speakers. Listen to the lyrics. I can relate reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally bad.
Everything you're not - Demi Lovato.

Dear Blog,
I'm sorry I pour my heart out to you, and force you to listen to what I say, and all my problems. But you're a good listener, and a good person to vent to. Better than quite a few people I know.
Sorry I put you through a lot of crap. Forgive me?

Emily.

I'm sorry I'm not fucking good enough for you.

I'm sorry I'm not 'pretty' enough. Or if my smile isn't good enough to make you smile. But you've given your heart to her, and when she destroys it, don't fucking say I didn't warn you. Because I fucking did. Don't expect that my shoulder will be there for you to cry on. You had your chance for all that crap.
Are you blind? I'm sure you are. Don't you see how much I long for you? And how I cringe everytime you talk about her? Don't you see what I see?
I'm sorry I'm not fucking good enough.

Oh, fuck you! I don't even know why I bother with you anymore! You just take my heart and throw it on the floor! How could you be so fucking blind?! You've ripped me to shreds. I'm just going to give up on you.

The reason why we make mistakes is so we can learn from them. Yet, you continue to make the same mistake, and never learn from it. And me? I keep making the mistake of forgiving you.

11 am, home:
Dad: "I married the wrong woman."
Emily: "... What?"
Dad: "Before we got married, we made an agreement that I took care of our childrens education, our house, jobs, and our future, and then I would be free to do whatever I wanted. And that includes getting back onto the track. And now, I have taken care of my part of the agreement, wait, I've actually given back 5 times what I agreed to, and she has kept me prisoner the whole time."
Emily: "... Look dad, if getting a divorce is what it's going to take for you to take control of your own life, me and Kev are going to support you the whole time."
Dad: ...


1:30 pm, Brighton, via text:
Emily: If mum and dad split, and we were forced to choose out of them to live with, I would choose dad.
Kevin: I couldn't decide.
Emily: Lol, because mum actually loves you, so you would love her in return.
Kevin: Yep. I love dad aswell.
Emily: Haha. Yeah. But mum treats me like dirt all the time, so thats why I would pick dad.
Kevin: True...


5:34 pm, Home:
Dad: "You know, if you and me have a divorce, and eventually that will happen if you keep treating me like crap, I'm taking the kids with me."
Mum: "Yeah, go ahead, take them."
Dad: "I'm serious... I will."
Mum: "Be my guest."
Emily: "I'd be happy to live with dad. I'd actually have some control of my own life."
Mum: "David, look at the bullshit you've put into our kids' heads. You've brainwashed them, and so have your family."
Emily: "No, mum. Dad hasn't done anything. And because of you, I havn't seen his family for around 7 years, so they definately havn't done anything. I'm being serious about what I said, and so did dad. I mean, you can't even talk to us in a fucken proper tone! You can't even go a fucking day without having a go at all of us over something! I'm a good girl, mum.  I get pretty good grades at school, and I've never gotten a suspension. Actually, I've never even got a fucking detention! I'm being forced into piano, and you know that I hate it. I'm forced into doing stupid accelerated maths this year. I have good friends, and I'm hardley ever allowed out with them. I've only said yes to half the things they invite me to, and sometimes when they ask to go out, I don't even ask you because I know you won't let me. I can't do anything without your permission. You don't treat me like a teenager, like you should! You have it so easy compared to other parents. What more do you want from me, mum?! What more can I do to make you happy?!"

Nick Jonas totally copied me with the glasses! :D

This one definately has to be my favourite.

:D

You get me so fucken furious. The thought of you just sickens me. You have no idea how lucky you are, and how things just easily come your way, whilst others stand back and watch in pain. You're just perfect. Honestly, you are. If my life was half as easy as yours, I would be so happy and appreciative. You're just too good, compared to me, and you just love to rub it in my face. And everyone else, they adore you, But they don't know the real you, and if they did, trust me, you wouldn't be so loved. I can't even look into your eyes without the pain of my heart being stabbed over and over. You've destroyed me. I hate being around you anymore. And it's not just me who knows what I'm feeling. There's others, too. If we had the choice, you wouldn't be in our lives anymore, but other people are involved, which is why we still live with the heart ache you cause us. If those other people weren't involved, we wouldn't be suffering the amount of pain that we do. Go die.

you, you've ripped my heart up in shreds. you've destroyed me. I hope you're fucken happy with yourself. have a nice fucking life.

I'm going to give up on you.

Just stop. Stop playing with me,
my head, my emotions,
my heart.

Just leave me alone.

I'm not your personal toy anymore.

Just leave.

... I'm sorry I couldn't be good enough for you.

These shoes are beautiful.

I want to take the easy way out, and just disappear from existence. But at the same time, I need you.

Here's the latest poem, from the anonymous poet:

It's amazing how I feel when I'm around you,
How my heart pounds when you come into a room.
I look at you and think: My God! How lovely!
And everything I am bursts into bloom.

I feel as though you must, you must be mine,
Not as a possession but a goal,
Something almost unimaginable:
The free devotion of another soul.

As though I were about to enter heaven
Or just within the hour condemned to die,
My mind with one fierce thought keeps running over,
With you, and only you, the reason why.
 
I think that's his best one so far.
(:

No edit, straight from the camera.

New Glasses. :)

I was going for 'Taylor Swift Curls', didn't really work...

In Year Seven.

I love Emily Densley-Walker :)

I need you.

You gotta take the good with the bad, and the smile with the sad. Love what you've got, and remember what you had. Always forgive, but never forget. Learn from mistakes, but never regret.

It's time to forgive and forget.
Forgive myself, for being so stupid.
And forget that you ever existed.

So this situation, well that's what I'm going to call it, has gotten so bad, that if I'm going to see my grandmother, it has to be kept a secret from my mother.
Sigh.

"Pain is what forces us to grow."

Hi Bloggers,
I just wanted to say that I know a wonderful poet.
He's deeeeeeeeeeeep. Haha.




Take a look:

I love you so deeply,
I love you so much,
I love the sound of your voice
And the way that we touch.
I love your warm smile
And your kind, thoughtful way,
The joy that you bring
To my life every day.

-

You changed my world with a blink of an eye
That is something that I cannot deny
You put my soul from worst to best
That is why I treasure you my dearest one
You just don't know what you have done for me
You even pushed me to the best that I can be
You really are an angel sent from above
Wow it this crazy thing called love.

-

Your hazel beautiful eyes
Are like woods on a warm spring day
When leaves have just unfolded
Bend under the weight of songful birds.
I look into your eyes and see
A timeless world of sun and breezes,
Of shade and mystical love.

-

If I could have just one wish,
I would wish to wake up everyday
to the sound of your breath on my neck,
the warmth of your lips on my cheek,
the touch of your fingers on my skin,
and the feel of your heart beating with mine...
Knowing that I could never find that feeling
with anyone other than you.

-

I remember the park
I remember the grass
I remember the time
you grabed my ass.


Amazing, right?
He asked to be kept anonymous, sorry! :)

Am I afraid of the ones I love?
Nah, I'm just terrified of the truth. from those who aren't afraid to share it.

Don't ask for my honest answer, or opinion, when you know there's a possible outcome that you won't like.

So Yeah, These are my two new pairs of glasses :D

I got them today. yayayayay.

Let me know what you think. :)

First thought when I wake up,
'My god, he's beautiful',
So I put on my make up,
And pray for a miracle.

-I'd lie by Taylor Swift.

It's nice to know that someone else is experiencing the same thing as I am. I don't feel so alone. We'll pull through this together.

"What's ment to be, will find its way."
Pfft, whatever.

Dear anonymous formspringger,
I'm leaving this reallyyyyy ugly blog layout for a day, for you to comment, or do what ever you wanted to do.
Aren't you special? Haha.
Yeah, well I'll change it back tommorow, so hurry up, 'cause right now, my blog's looking hideous. :)

I sometimes wonder what people think when they look at me. I often wonder what others think of me. I know that they would probably see me as a 'happy girl', living a 'pretty good life', but I wonder if they would ever consider that the smile which is shown on my face is a complete phoney. Or a stupid laugh, would they even consider that it's not real? And I'm just covering up my feelings? And they just stare right through me. When people look at me, do they ever wonder if there's any destruction within me? Or do they just think that I'm living, what seems a 'perfect' life.

fuck parents.
no internet... for a week?!

...nah, stuff them. i'm using the internet whether they like it or not.

Hey you! I just wanted to tell you that I'm not a toy, nor something you can choose to put and take off a shelf, or an option available to you when you have nothing left. That is all. Thanks. (:

Get the fuck out of my life. How dare you take this fucking short cut?! And leave us all stranded on this island. Look at what you have created. Look at this fucking big mess you're leaving us to clean up. You have completely destroyed my uncle. You fucking fithly, backstabbing, unfaithful, hypocitritical, life ruining bitch. I'm never going to see you the same way, you are a stranger. I'm furious. Just fuck off and leave us all alone. We would all benifet from that. He does not need you. I do not need you. We all do not need you. Be gone, for good, and never, ever, ever dare to attempt coming back.

Oh, the disapointment when you realise that dream wasn't real.

Dear Myself,
You REALLY gotta attempt to start doing the holiday homework.
No, Wait... You REALLY gotta get into good study habbits this year.

This years goal: Get into a good study habbit, and actually complete homework.

Seeing you smile, and laugh at me, gives me hope.
It hurts when you destroy the hope that I find.

Loving you, hurts me.
Why do I still bother with you? I'm only destroying myself.

So last night, I slept over at Sophies joint. Quite a funny night. The face masks were pretty cool. Haha.
And today, myself, Sophie and Kathryn spent the day at Highpoint with Matthew, and his friend. We saw The Last Song, which was actually an amazing movie.
I got a new pair of Converse Shoes. :D
And I went out with mummie for dinner.
Tomorow, I'll be doing some bowling with the cousins. Yaaaay.

Today I saw the most amazing dress. It was like calling out for me, I'm sure.
Too bad I'm broke.
One day, we'll be together.

Also, today, I ordered 2 new pairs of glasses. Yay!
Finaaaaaaally, I am actually getting some new pairs. Yayayayayay.
I'll post pictures once I actually have them.
First, need to have a eye-examination on Saturday, then I can pick them up like a week after.

Team Jonas! :D

I want to run away into the darkness, and never return.

Take my hand tonight
We could run so far
We could change the world
Do anything we want
We could stop for hours
Just staring at the stars
They shine down to show us

You know when the sun forgets to shine
I'll be there to hold you through the night
We'll be running so fast we could fly tonight
And even when we're miles and miles apart
You're still holding all of my heart
Promise it'll never be dark
I know, we're inseperable

We could run forever
If we wanted to
I would not get tired
Because I'd be with you
I'd keep singing this song
Untill the very end
We'd have done all these things

You know when the sun forgets to shine
I'll be there to hold you through the night
We'll be running so fast we could fly tonight
And even when we're miles and miles apart
You're still holding all of my heart
Promise it'll never be dark
I know, we're inseperable

I will give it all
Never let you fall
Cause I know, we're inseperable
I will give it all
Just to show you I'm in love
Cause I know
We're inseperable

You know when the sun forgets to shine
I'll be there to hold you through the night
We'll be running so fast we could fly tonight
And even when we're miles and miles apart
You're still holding all of my heart
Promise it'll never be dark
I know, we're inseperable

Right now, I am currently obsessing over Smosh, a verrrrrry popular youtube channel. Gosh, how Anthony and Ian make me laugh.
I highly recommend them, if you havn't already heard of them.

www.formspring.me/musicismyescape
go go go! :)

These are my new nails. I am quite proud of my work of art. :P

Not a very good picture of me, haha. But I love having stars on my nails, and I wanted to show you all.

Happy Easter Bloggers!
____________________________________________

Yesterday, I went over to Saran's house, for a few hours. Haha, they were a good few hours.

And I know what you're thinking... I hate my fringe too. It needs to grow like reaaaaaly bad. Especially before school starts.

Anyhow, this morning, I woke up at 11:13, because of a 4-hour, late night chat with Sophie Wong, Kathryn Tan, and Matthew House. Oh, and a virtual sleepover using Skype with Sophie. I'm stuffed. I don't even know how I have the energy to write this.

Today is Saturday, and like I promised my readers, another chapter of my Fanfic will be completed, and ready to read by the end of the day. If you're interested in reading some, here's the link:
http://www.facebook.com/topic.php?uid=5836432901&topic=191871
Happy reading!

Ciao bloggers.

I can still dream.
Right? Amy? Haha.

jacob! jacob! jacob!

This is Amy, myself, and Jacob Black,

celebrating the release of New Moon on DVD.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Today was a really good day.
I woke to my mother: "Good morning Emily, Time to get up, its 10:30", and she gave me a nice hug. Hmm, weird, I think, comming from her. A complete change. It reminded me of the old days, when we used to get along so well, when our relationship was so effortless. Anyway, she continued being, lets just say nice, throughout the day, before she had to go to work. I hope she'll continue to be this, uhh lovely, for as long as she can.
Anyway, another thing brightened my day, but I can't be bothered explaining it. Let's just say it involves Nick Jonas and Demi Lovato. ;)
After Mum left to work, Dad took me and my brother to this easter egg factory. Ha, it was pretty cooooool. On the way back, he took us to his primary school. It makes me wonder if Overnewton will still be up and running when I have kids...
Anyway, Today was a good day. :)

Pinch punch, first day of the month.
Happy April Fools Day!

... I was bored.